DC House of Horror (2017)

Beyond the $9.99 price tag DC House of Horror fails to live up to its name.

Even with Keith Giffen plotting stories for Superman, Wonder Woman, Batman, Two-Face, Green Arrow, the Justice League, Harley Quinn and Shazam the book never delivers. The closest to creepy it comes are with the Two-Face and the Justice League tales. The rest seem to be more head scratchers that have the reader wishing for the half hour back they invested in the book.

Kudos to DC for remembering us at Halloween time, but time and money are better spent on something like the Giffen plotted and JM DeMatteis scripted Scooby Apocalypse: Scooby and Mystery Inc. meet Resident Evil. Woot woot.

This one-and-done Christmas story reads more like any 1960s Marvel team book complete with angst and love triangles.

Amidst unrequited love the Freedom Fighters find a new foe to tangle with known only as the Elf who is in league with the evil Silver Ghost. The plan is to turn the Earth on its axis so New York is the new North Pole.

I kid you not.

Cain and Able extend happy holidays to escaped convict “Killer” Cowan who chooses to wait out the dragnet on Christmas Eve with the caretakers.

Part of the Dollar Comic line of the time, the pair teamed when DC foreclosed on the House of Secrets and moved Able in with his abusive brother. Throughout this issue the duo tag team to entertain Cowan until he finally learns the true meaning of consequences at the behest of Santa’s helpers.

There’s an innocence that’s rekindled as Impulse discovers a childhood he never had. Maybe that’s what helped make the DC Universe fun again. Each issue held a charm that made you wanna be young again.

Especially the Christmas issues.

Toss in guest stars Plastic Man and Mr. Mxyzptlk and, well, there’s Christmas magic again.

Here’s a blueprint for a Christmas comic book. Like the Pixar movies, Impulse is for young and old alike. Not just this issue – “Christmas Impulse” – but all 89.

Taken as a one-and-done readers unfamiliar with Bart Allen’s little Alabama universe may feel some confusion. My recommendation is take issue one, read and repeat until you’ve devoured the run.

Great cover, but misleading.

While I love the issue, Impulse 34 does not contain a Christmas story. Don’t let that deter you from picking this and the following issue outta the back issues for a good read.

Who am I kidding? Pull the trigger and pick up the whole run. You just have to wait till issue 45 for a Christmas story.

There’s enough fire and brimstone to make a Southern Baptist preacher proud, though John Ostrander deals with the issues without a pulpit.

Spectre 26 meets all the requirements for Christmas clichés, but is still a good read.

Tarzan (1972) 207

Hard to imagine, but there’s Christmas even in the steamiest, darkest regions of the world as evidenced in Tarzan 207; DC’s first installment chronicling the adventures the jungle lord.

Taking its numbering from where Gold Key left off, DC Comics, then still National Periodicals, handed writing chores to Joe Kubert allowing him to retell the origin of Tarzan.

A brief interlude between the main stories included a short bio of Tarzan creator Edgar Rice Burrows and a story about Tarzan’s first Christmas. The holiday tale is more prose and illustrations – like an abbreviated Big Little Book – that first appeared in Sunday newspaper strips Dec. 27, 1931 illustrated by Hal Foster.

Marv Wolfman warped up the book with a second of Burrow’s most famous creations, John Carter of Mars.

Nancy Collins serves up the legend of Papa Noel for the French descendants of the original River Parishes of Louisiana as Christmas fair.

For those with deep roots Joyeux Noel” and “Frohliche Weihnacten.”

Swamp Thing (1985) 115

Teen Titans (1966) 13

This is one I’ve been waiting to add; a personal favorite of mine since I first read it way back in Christmas of 1973 in the first DC Limited Collector’s Edition (C-34) Christmas With the Super Heroes.

Following the Summer of Love counter culture was becoming mainstream and everyone was jumping on the band wagon. Though watered down, Teen Titans 13 attempts to capture the flavor as Mod became part of the English language. Writer Bob Haney beat readers over their collective heads with the vernacular as Robin, Auqalad, Wonder Girl and Kid Flash flung slang throughout the issue. Artist Nick Cardy proved to be ahead of the advertising curve with product placement as prevalent as porn on the Internet.

This is just a fun read and peek at the times.